BEHIND THE SMILE
Recently, I was told I come off as the girl that most people assume “has it all together”. I laughed. Then sighed. Because if they only knew… In reality, it’s quite untrue.
Needless to say, the conversation was a much-needed push to share the messier side of life.
Given it’s been a minute since my last post, I thought I’d spill why I went M.I.A. plus how I recovered from an emotional (and spiritual) rock bottom.
GOING AWOL
I don’t know about y’all but the last few months wore me out. The stress was more than I could handle. Anddd to no surprise… I shut down.
It wasn’t pretty.
Obviously, the mile-long to-do list didn’t help. My day-to-day became a series of unmanageable demands.
I became more reliant on caffeine than on Jesus—which is crazy considering I don’t even like coffee!
And sure enough, my daily devotional and prayer time evolved into what felt like another chore. (One I regrettably skipped.)
It didn’t take long before I reached my tipping point and fell head-first into a state of depression. Drained in every which way, I hid behind a smile and under the covers when I could. Yet no amount of shut-eye could lift my spirits.
But it’s not like I hit this major low out of nowhere; the negative energy had been steadily building for awhile. Because somewhere along the line, I became distracted and let go of the #1 most important thing: GOD.
Meanwhile, I also gave up writing. Discouragement settled in. At the peak of this burnout, I felt numb. Empty, even.
THE TURNAROUND
Eventually, the Holy Spirit intervened. In lieu of the depression, I was left with a total change of heart. The Lord’s relentless pursuit never fails. Hallelujah.
I realized several things: Yes, pain and suffering is real. But so is God’s deliverance. And despite any situation, He is GOOD.
THE TAKE-AWAY
Getting closer to God isn’t rocket science. So let’s not overcomplicate it.
Scripture states “Draw near to God, and He will come near to you” (James 4:8). Therefore, there’s not a gap too wide that grace can’t fill.
Getting closer to God isn’t rocket science. So let’s not overcomplicate it. Scripture states ‘Draw near to God, and He will come near to you’ (James 4:8). Therefore, there’s not a gap too wide that grace can’t fill.
STEPS TO RECONNECT
1. Toss out the temptations, stat.
We all have a go-to binge. Whether it be watching too much reality TV or overindulging in carbs, social media, or alcohol—it’s holding us back all the same. Commit yourself to not falling into these false comforts and instead…
2. Schedule consistent one-on-one time with Jesus.
This has been an ongoing battle of mine throughout years: developing the discipline of spending set-aside time with God. We were made to enjoy a relationship with our Maker. So taking that time to study the Scriptures is absolutely essential. Get this, sis: whatever you’re going through has ALREADY been conquered on the cross. How else could we walk in said #truth (and freedom!) unless we know it? Claim verses, memorize them, and meditate on them throughout the day. I’ve even added a few at the end of this post if you want to start there.
3. Get to the root of things in daily prayer.
Explore WHAT you’re feeling and WHY. This may take some time. Go deep with your heart and then surrender it to Him. Address the bigger picture like this: Where is my heart at right now? Is there sin I need to confront? Am I recognizing Him as both my Lord and Savior? Don’t hold back. Lay it all before Him. He’s a come-as-you-are God who doesn’t let us leave-as-we-were.
4. Seek out Christian community on the weekly.
Proverbs 27:17 gives it to us straight: “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another”. Meaning, having other believers nearby will help us grow spiritually. My recommendation? Find an older, more mature woman (or two!) to counsel you. I cannot express how much discipleship has challenged me to dive deeper with God. My faith has grown exponentially with my mentors’ support.
IN SHORT
Know this: no matter however distant you might feel from God, He’s never far away… “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18).
What’s been on your heart these days? Leave a comment below—I’d love to hear!
Enjoying my blog so far? Don’t miss a ♥ beat! Subscribe to my email list to gain exclusive access and receive FREE content and updates delivered right to your inbox.
Make sure to follow me on Pinterest or Instagram for more!
VERSES TO MEDITATE ON
- “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” (Jeremiah 29:13)
- “Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always.” (1 Chronicles 16:11)
- “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
Loved this! Community for sure. You’re so loved!!! I hope everyday you feel Gods grace. Sending hugs 💕
Thank you so much. I am blessed to have a friend like you!
It’s such a relief to know other people are suffering, too. Thank you for sharing these helpful tips!
Yes! I agree. We are all fighting battles of our own. So happy you found these words encouraging. Xx
I’m sorry it’s been such a challenging season for you, but I’m thankful to hear how the Holy Spirit is working in and through you! Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing to help your other sisters.